I NEARLY DID what I never do – and bailed out of a Scotland game; but, VAR rescued me. I wondered, when we qualified back in November, how we would blow this World Cup – familiarity with the original video and the subsequent sequels having convinced me it would all end in tears. I never for a moment thought, handing gifts to Brazil would be our chosen form of hari kari this time.
Had VAR not rescued Jack Hendry, I would have shut off the TV there and then and gone to bed, but, against my better judgement, I hung around. We may yet, somehow, scrape into the last 32, but, this is Scotland, I fear once again, we will be quoting Private Frazer as we survey the wreckage of another failed campaign.
Our virtual no show last night at least cheered-up the England fans. Bad as their over-hyped team was in only drawing with Ghana, they still played better than we did in Miami.
I saw a great philosophical quote on social media – regarding Scotland at major tournaments: “It's not the hope that kills, it's knowing that the hope that kills is going to kill us”. Sums us up rather neatly. Every tournament, off we go with high hopes, but, in the back of our minds we know those hopes are going to be dashed, it's just, we don't as yet know how we will mess up this time.
I can see us finishing-up ranked ninth of the third-placed teams in the groups, failing to qualify by one goal, in which case, who gets to carry the can – Grant Hanley or Scott McKenna?
Would not getting out of the group be so bad? It might save us from an even-bigger embarrassing exit at the last 32?
I mean, honestly, can you see our collection of honest triers getting any further?
Then, once we have pulled ourselves together and dragged ourselves home, we can revert to type. The Glasgow-based papers will call for Stevie Clarke's head and suggest we ought to have played more Old Firm players – totally forgetting, the Old Firm squads are not exactly over-flowing with home-bred talent.
That's the problem with Scottish Fitba in 2026 – we don't have many Scots playing.
This tournament has been our tenth tilt at the global show, and you know what, statistically, it's been our fourth-best effort.
Our best showing was in 1974 – when we went unbeaten through our group, but failed to qualify for the knock-out phase, finishing 9th of the 16 competing teams. In that tournament we amassed 5 points, from one win and two draws, finished with a +2 goal difference and a 33% winning record.
Next best was the much-maligned 1978 campaign, when we finished 11th of the 16 competing nations. We amassed 4 points from one win and one draw, finished with a -1 goal difference and a 33% winning record.
In 1982 we again amassed 4 points, from one win and one draw, we had an equal goal difference, again a 33% wining record and ended up 15th of the 24 competing nations.
We don't yet know where we will end up this year, but, if we do have to come home having again failed to get out of the group, the consolation is, we have still performed better this time than we did in 1954, 1958, 1986, 1990 and 1998.
The truth is, we are consistently poor at the World Cup and an awful lot of wee nations we used to, and perhaps still do consider to be “Diddy Teams” have got better than us.
That's not Stevie Clarke's fault, he can only work with what he's got, perhaps the censure ought to be directed at the High Heid Yins of our game, who have gone down the road of buying-in ready-made non-Scots, of questionable pedigree, to the detriment of native talent.
Our lack of top-class talent is most-evident when it comes to goal-scoring. We have now played 26 games in our 10 tilts at the World Cup Finals. Only twice, when we beat Netherlands via Archie Gemmill's great goal in 1978, and four years later when we stuck five on New Zealand, have we scored more than two goals in a single game in the tournament.
Much was made of John McGinn joining the elite group of scorers who have scored more than 20 international goals for Scotland. He's in there with Hughie Gallacher, Lawrie Reilly, Kenny Dalglish and Denis Law. Of that elite group only Gallacher has scored at a goal a game or better for his country, while only Law and Reilly have bettered the 0.5 goals per game benchmark for an elite striker.
Until we unearth a striker capable of hitting the back of the net regularly and the midfielders capable of supplying him with ammunition, we are never going to get out of the group, should we ever again qualify for a World Cup finals tournament.
Unearthing that striker isn't Stevie Clarke's job, that;s down to the clubs and the coaching system, which clearly isn't working. Aye, Private Frazer was right.
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