Socrates MacSporran

Socrates MacSporran
No I am not Chick Young, but I can remember when Scottish football was good

Thursday 15 August 2019

Just Another Dodgy Night In Paradise

EVEN BEFORE the players had finished drying themselves off from their post-game shower, and wee Neil Lennon was ready to offer his excuses to the waiting Scottish press corps, social media was awash with fans of Scotland's “diddy” teams, plus of course the pbi of the other half of the Forces of Darkness, revelling in the Hoops horror show on Tuesday night.

In a rare moment of sanity, one Kilmarnock fan, on a Killie social media chat room enquired as to why, Scotland, seemingly alone of nations with an interest in football, had followers of the Beautiful Game, who revelled in the misfortunes of other clubs.

I fear that Killie fan has a somewhat solitary and sheltered existence; did he not hear the loud guffaws, emanating from the direction of Ayr, of Honest Men relishing Killie's loss to Connah's Quay Nomads, in the qualifying round of the Europa League?

Schadenfreude, relishing the misfortunes of others, is ingested like mother's milk by football fans, in Scotland and elsewhere, and, when the club which shat in the nest has a following so convinced of their own greatness and entitlement to win every game as The Celtic Family, and their partners in crime, across the city – who loudly proclaim: “We arra peepel,” when they fuck-up, which they seem to do in Europe each year – surely the rest of us can be forgiven our mass outbreak of: “Get it right fuckin' up ye, ya shower o' bastards.”

The facts cannot be disputed, Celtic, the Champions of Scotland, the richest club in that country, a club with a regular home attendance of considerably over 50,000 fans for each home game; a team ranked 47th in Europe, and playing in the league ranked 20th in Europe, were beaten at home and knocked-out of the Champions League, at the qualifying stage, by the champions of the league which is ranked 29th in Europe – a team which is itself ranked 288th in Europe.

By any standards, this was a terrible result for Celtic, and for Scottish football. But, it is not the first time in recent years they have been badly beaten in Europe. However, they will continue to be the richest club in Scotland. They will continue to have the highest-paid squad and they will probably still win all three domestic trophies this season.

Two days on, as Rangers – European Club Ranking, 206, co-efficient 4.425 – prepare to defend their two-goal advantage in the second leg of their Europa League qualifier, against Midtjylland – European Club Ranking, 102, co-efficient 206 – the normal bravado of Ra Peepel on such nights has not been as-pronounced as normal.

The majority of the 50,000 Rangers fans inside Ibrox tonight will see the Danes as just another “diddy” team, from a “diddy” league, to be crushed under the Rangers tanks. However, some will have noticed, Denmark is ranked 16th in Europe, Scotland is ranked 20th.

The Danes have more European experience than Rangers; they play in a higher-ranked league; by these measurements – while Rangers, with home advantage and two away goals banked in case of need, and the backing of a partisan 50,000-plus crowd, should win – that is no gimme.

Prior to this season, Scottish clubs had embarked on 270 campaigns in official European club competitions, since 1955-56. These 270 campaigns, by 22 different clubs, have yielded just three victories. That's a 1.11% success rate. Or, to put it another way, in 98.89% of the seasons, we are wasting our time and money even entering – since we've nae chance.

Try telling that to the pensioners, who, as teenagers and young men had their taste of European glory in Lisbon in 1967; the slightly younger guys who were in Barcelona in 1972, or Gothenburg in 1983. They will tell you: “Aye it was worth, greatest day of my life supporting the club,” etc. But, we have to face facts, the last of these glorious days was in 1983 – when:


  • Thatcher was Prime Minister

  • Neil Kinnock was leader of the Opposition

  • The SNP had a mere two seats in Parliament

  • Lester Piggot won his ninth Derby on Teenoso

  • The USA first put cruise missiles into Greenham Common, sparking off lengthy demonstrations

  • The CD was the newest technological break through

  • Actor and writer David Niven, actor John Le Mesurier (Sgt. Wilson in Dad's Army) and Violet Carson (Ena Sharples In Coronation Street) were among the prominent people who died that year.


We don't even need to go that far back. Eight years ago, we were ranked, as a league, 13th in Europe. As such, we had TWO teams in the Champions League, Rangers, as Scottish Champions, were straight through to the Group stages, while Celtic, having finished second in the league, entered at the third qualifying round stage, one round later than as Champions, they had started this season.

In the last decade – excluding this current season, we have seen 50 European campaigns by our clubs begin and end; in a mere 12 of these campaigns, just 24%, have we seen the Scottish team even reach the group stages.

On only 4 of these 12 occasions – one campaign in three:


  • Rangers in the Europa League in 2010-11 – round of 16

  • Celtic in the Champions League in 2012-13 – round of 16

  • Celtic in the Europa League in 2014-15 – round of 32

  • Celtic in the Europa League last season – round of 32


has one of our representatives got to the business end of the European season, the knock-out stages.

We are now a mediocre football nation, we have embraced mediocrity, but still, inside our heads, we have this vision of Scotland, the nation which invented modern football – the beautiful passing game.

And, until we banish: Here's tae us – wha's like us, and accept: We're shite, and we know we are, but, we are going to do something about this; then never again will we get to savour nights like Lisbon, Barcelona or Gothenburg.

Mind you, if we need to have someone to blame for the decline in Scottish football, I can think of an obvious candidate. Step forward Graeme Souness.

Up until Souness took over as Rangers manager in 1986, Scottish football's record in Europe was:

played 287 – won 168 – drawn 0 – lost 119 – wins 58.54% of games – 3 outright trophy wins – 3 further final appearances

Since 1986 our record is:

played 450 – won 185 – drawn 46 – lost 229 – wins 41.1% of games – no trophy wins – two final appearances

(there were no drawn games pre-1986, even if one leg of a two-legged tie finished all-square. Draws only became possible with the introduction of groups).

That represents a 30% fall-off in performance across the board. And, what dramatic change did Souness bring about? Well, prior to his arrival, Scottish sides in Europe tended to be mainly all—Scottish sides. Sure, we had the odd Scandinavian or English or Irish import, but, generally, we relied on Scotsmen. After all, if the greatest of all Scottish club sides could be comprised of 11 players, born within 40 miles of the club's ground, we had no need of foreigners.

Souness changed that. That Celtic team which stumbled out of Europe on Tuesday night had only 9 Scots in the 18-man match-day squad. What they didn't have was something Celtic and indeed Rangers have relied-on right from the start of Scottish involvement in European club football – a fan on the park; a Bertie Auld, Roy Aitken or Tommy Burns, somebody who would happily die for the club, who knew what the fans expected, and strove to deliver. A man who, if he hadn't been good enough to don the hoops, would have been in the crowd roaring them on.

Maybe we should get back to trusting Scottish talent, and making that talent work it socks off, if we are to again be among the leading nations in Europe.

But, getting to the low point we are at today, had not been a sudden decline, more a case of an accelerating downhill journey:


  • 1950s – 50 of European matches won

  • 1960s – 63.2% won

  • 1970s – 53.8% won

  • 1980s – 57.9% won

  • 1990s – 40% won

  • 2000s – 44.6% won

  • 2010s – 34.8% won


It's time to apply the brakes and start the climb back.








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