Deila's Departing - Next Please

THE Ronnie Roar will shortly become a near-forgotten whisper. Back he will go to the fjords, well-recompensed for his spell in Glasgow, and, hopefully with a cracking book to write.

Peter Lawwell and the High Heid Yins will find another manager, and, with normal service resumed, both Bigot Brothers in the top flight, Scottish football will settle down to more mediocrity. Yawn.

Just a mischievous thought. Suppose, traumatised by their Scottish Cup semi-final defeat, the Celtic squad falls apart over the five remaining games of the season - can Aberdeen keep it together sufficiently to close that eight-point gap and overhaul them?

Ah hae ma doots, not so much about Celtic collapsing, that could still happen, but more-so about Aberdeen's ability to take advantage of any such collapse.

Appointing Deila was a brave move. Clearly Celtic has decided it hasn't worked. Therefore, the High Heid Yins at Parkhead MUST get their next appointment right.

For me, going anywhere other than David Moyes would be stupid. He is, as far as I can see, the best guy out there, immediately available. As for re-appointing Neil Lennon. Well, Glasgow will be a tinder box next season, with the Rangers Tribute Act in the top division - why risk throwing petrol on things?

I appreciate Lenny is older and wiser, but, are the nutters who despise him?

Any way, forget a new manager, what Celtic desperately needs is A Fan On The Park - a Celtic supporter who appreciates what those masses of supporters want to see from the players, and who appreciates the expectations on the men wearing the Hoops. That is what the current squad so-obviously lacks and is crying out for.

SIXTY years ago today, as Hearts' team bus left Tynecastle for Hampden, on the morning of Saturday, 21 April, 1956, everyone on-board knew, the club had not won the trophy for exactly 50-years. Indeed it had been 49 years since they had been in the final.

Dave Mackay - Man of the Match in the 1956 Scottish Cup Final 

Hearts first won the trophy in 1891, beating Dumbarton 1-0. In 1896 they had won the first all-Edinburgh affair, beating Hibs 3-1; then, in 1901 they had edged-out Celtic 4-3 in a seven-goal thriller. Two years later they were back in the final, losing 2-0 to Rangers, following 1-1 and 0-0 draws, before, in 1906 they beat Third Lanark 1-0 at Ibrox.

In 1907 they took their defence of the trophy all the way to the final, where they lost 3-0 to a Celtic team adding the Scottish Cup to the third of their six straight League Champioinships. Since then, Hearts had been in seven semi-finals, and lost them all. Now, back in their first final since 1907, and facing the same opponents, Celtic, might it be time for a change?

Hearts' hopes were high, however. Their route to the final – a 3-0 home win over Forfar Athletic, another Tynecastle canter, putting five past Stirling Albion without reply, a 4-0 hammering of league champions-elect Rangers in the quarter-final, again at Tynecastle, and, after a 0-0 draw, a 3-0 semi-final replay win over Raith Rovers the Gorgie men had reached the final without conceding a goal.

Celtic, in their third successive final, and having overturned the 1955 final result by beating Clyde 2-1 in their semi-final, had got to Hampden via a 2-0 win at Morton, a 3-0 win at Ayr United, a 2-1 Parkhead win over Airdrie, before that semi-final triumph.

But, Celtic had injury problems for the final, and even the Glasgow-published newspapers made Hearts the favourites. Celtic would be without centre-half and captain Jock Stein and outside-right Bobby Collins, and, as more than one newspaper pointed-out, they lacked the reserve strength to accommodate the loss of these two important players.

The Celtic board, or more-precisely Chairman Robert Kelly, picked the team then, and when they named their team – Dick Beattie; Frank Meechan and Sean Fallon, youngster Eric Smith, Bobby Evans, captain in place of Stein, and Bertie Peacock; youngster Billy Craig – making his solitary Scottish Cup appearance for the club, Mike Haughney (usually at right-back), Neil Mochan, Willie Fernie and Charlie Tully, even the most-committed Celtic fans were shocked at the lack of experience down the right.

Hearts lined-up at full-strength for the time, with skipper Bobby Parker a long-term absentee through injury. Their tea was: Willie Duff in goal, Bobby Kirk and Tam Mackenzie at full-back, the half-back line of Dave Mackay, skipper Freddie Glidden and John Cumming, with teenager Alex Young and Under-23 cap Ian Crawford on the wings, outside the immortal "Terrible Trio" of inside forwards Alfie Conn, "King" Willie Bauld and Johnny Wardhaugh.

Crawford, after Bauld had done the spade-work, shot Hearts in front after 20 minutes, with some reports crediting the then notorious "Hampden Swirl" as playing a part in Celtic 'keeper Dick Beattie's failure to deal with the shot. The same player, from a Bauld cross, made it 2-0 three minutes after half-time, but a mistake by Duff, with that "Swirl" again being blamed, was punished by stand-in inside forward Haughney to reduce the leeway.

John Cumming is led off with a head cut during the 1956 Scottish Cup final

Hearts suffered something of a crisis of confidence at this point, but, driven-on by Man of the Match Mackay, and by Cumming, who made light of a cut head: "Blood doesn't show on a maroon shirt" was his comment; they regained the initiative and, with ten minutes left, Alfie Conn ensured the cup would be going to Edinburgh by scoring Hearts' third goal.

There was no way back for Celtic, with referee Bobby Davidson, shortly afterwards blowing his whistle to signal the end of Hearts' half century of Scotish Cup heartache.

Hearts had won the League Cup the previous season, the club's Golden Era was now under way. League titles would follow in 1958 and 1960 – but, incredibly, they would have to wait another 50-years, after final heartache in 1965, 1976, 1986 and again in 1996, until that remarkable penalty shoot-out win over Gretna in 2006, before world football's oldest trophy would return to Tynecastle.

Only skipper Glidden, now 87 and Alex Young, the baby of the cup-winning side, are still alive. Sadly, neither is in the best of health, but, surely, today of all days, they will recall their part in ending their club's lengthy wait for a capital Cup collection.

 

Ronnie Might Be A Dead Man Walking, But, He Will Still Win The League

I GROW ever more disillusioned with the state of the Mainstream Media in Scotland today, every time I log onto a newspaper website, or, increasingly rarely, actually buy a hard copy of a Scottish daily newspaper, this feeling intensifies.

Ronnie Deila - a Dead Man Walking apparently

 It might be argued, writing-off Ronnie Deila as Celtic manager qualifies as "news" – at least under the William Randolph Hurst definition: "News is something somebody does not want published – everything else is advertising". Since these: "Deila is a deam man walking" stories all lack one thing – a reliable quote or source, getting printed on the basis of rumour and: "sources close to Celtic", then we have to assume – the Deila is a goner stories are merely the opinions of the journalists whose by-line is on the story, or the opinion of the paper's Sports Editor.

OK, if we are dealing in Opinion, rather than News – maybe the papers ought to make clear: This is an opinion piece. Everyone is entitled to an opinion, publishing rumours is hardly good journalism, the punters deserve checkable facts to be laid before them.

Here are some facts:

Since the end of World War II, Celtic have won 27 of the 70 Scottish League campaigns played; this is a 39% success rate.

Between 1946 and 1965 – when Jock Stein was appointed manager, they won 1 of 20 campaigns; this is a 5% success rate.

Under Stein, between 1965 and 1978 they won 9 of 13 full campaigns: this is a 69% success rate.

Since Stein departed, they have won 16 of 37 campaigns; this is a 43% success rate.

Their average percentage of points gained when winning the league is 84% on-average; when Celtic have won the league during this period, they have won it by 10 clear points. Their biggest winning margin was in2013-14, when they won the League by 29 points, their smallest was in 1986, when they pipped Hearts on goal difference.

These 27 league wins have included 3 Trebles, in 1966-67 an 1968-69, under Stein and in 2000-01, under Martin O'Neill.

There have also been 15 Doubles – 9 League and Scottish Cup and 6 League and League Cup.

In seasons in which they have failed to win the league, they have won 12cups – 7 Scottish Cups and 5 League Cups.

Overall, therefore, Celtic have won 60 of the 210 domestic competitions which they have played; this equates to a 29% success rate.

In the same period, Rangers – ("real" Rangers, rather than the Rangers Tribute Act) won 81 of the 201 domestic competitions which they played in; this equates to a 40% success rate.

Taking these facts into consideration, can someone please tell me: from whence this sense of entitlement which seems to be coming from the Celtic Family arose?

It cannot be disputed, Celtic is the second-most-successful club in Scottish football history. There is also a perception that Celtic MUST play an attractive, entertaining, goal-scoring brand of football. This is expected of the team.

However, there is no benchmark as to what constitutes: " an attractive, entertaining, goal-scoring brand of football". The ability to score more than three goals per game is often cited as a benchmark for entertaining football. Well, during the Golden Era of "nine-in-a-row" between 1965-66 and 1973-74, when the Lisbon Lions, Kenny Dalglish, Davie Hay, Danny McGrain & the likes made Celtic Park the place to watch football, only twice did Celtic exceed the gold standard of averaging three goals per game.

Such goal-mouth pyrotechnics have been rare in the years since. Statistically, the club's most-successful league season, since the Stein Era, was 2001-02, when Celtic set the 38-game top-flight record of 103 points, winning 90% of the points it is possible to accrue. They didn't score three goals per game that season. That was the team of Lambert, Lennon and Larsson, of Hartson and Sutton; and, their average of 2.47 goals per game was sufficient for the task in hand.

The current Celtic squad does not have players of that calibre, but, they have, thus far this season, hit the opposition's net on average 2.36 times per game – which is not that far behind the strike rate of the 2002 team.

As is shown in the figures above, Celtic's average points take in the seasons in whch they have won the league since the end of WWII has been 84%. Since Rangers were liquidated, tht average take has fallen to 79%, and this season, they are on track to win the league with a take of around 77%. Not great, but, hardly a convincing case for sacking a manager who is working with a budget much-reduced from those his predecessors had to work with.

For most of their history, Celtic were a "grow your own" club. Certainly, from the very beginning, when they enticed James Kelly from Renton, and a handful of great players from Hibs, Celtic have never been afraid to recruit from outwith the club. But, they have a proud traition of breeding from within – one thinks of "The Kelly Kids" and the "Quality Street Gang".

Martin O'Neill's success was based on ignoring these time-honoured strictures. He recruited at what was for Scotland, big-money buying prices, and, somewhere along the way, Celtic appears to have forgotten how to bring through home-grown talent.

Between 1946 and 1955, when European club football kicked-off and Under-23 international began, 7 young, home-grown Celtic players came through the ranks to play for Scotland. They were: Willie Miller, Bobby Evans, John McPhail, Bobby Collins, Mike Haughney, Neil Mochan and Willie Fernie. A young Celtic reserve, deemed: "surplus to requirements", one Tommy Docherty, was sold to Preston North End – the Doc didn't have a bad football career thereafter.

And Celtic's breeding policy didn't just aid Scotland, Bertie Peacock and Charlie Tully won Northern Ireland caps, while Sean Fallon was capped by the Republic.

Jock Stein - won one Scottish League cap with Celtic

In addition, a further seven players: Tommy Kiernan, Pat McAulay, Tommy Bogan, Jimmy Mullen, Joe Baillie, Alec Boden and a certain Jock Stein – bought cheaply from non-league football in Wales, won Scottish League "caps" – an honour equivalent to some of the full caps given for "international challenge matches" these days.

Between 1955 and 1965, while Stein was learning how to be a coach with the Celtic reserve squad, Chairman Robert Kelly instituted a youth policy – "The Kelly Kids". This was a long-term development project. Most of the Lisbon Lions joined the club during this time and in that decade nine Celtic players won full caps: Dunky MacKay, Eric Smith, Bertie Auld, Frank Haffey, Billy McNeill, Pat Crerand, Stevie Chalmers, Jim Kennedy and Jimmy Johnstone. A further eight youngsters, Jim Walsh, John Higgins, John Colrain, Dick Beattie, John Hughes, Johnny Divers, Bobby Jeffrey and Ian Young won either Under-23 or Scottish League honours – which Hughes would convert to full caps when Stein returned. Paddy Turner was also capped by the Republic of Ireland during this time.

No sooner had Stein returned than Hughes won his first cap, to be followed into the national team by: Bobby Murdoch, Tomy Gemmell, Joe McBride, John Clark, Bobby Lennox, Ronnie Simpson, Willie Wallace, Jim Craig, Davie Hay, Jim Brogan, Kenny Dalglish, Lou Macari, Danny McGrain, George Connelly, Dixie Deans, Paul Wilson, Ronnie Glavin and Joe Craig.

Of that stellar band, only Simpson, Wallace and McBride were bought-in, and only Wallace arrived at Parkhead already capped by Scotland. Charlie Gallacher also won Republic of Ireland caps.

Other home-grown talent also won international recognition during this period. Pat McCluskey, Roddy MacDonald, Roy Aitken, Tommy Burns and Joe Casey won either Under-23 or Under-21 "caps" during the Stein Years, while Willie O'Neill, Harry Hood and Tommy Callaghan won Scottish League honours.

Stein would give full caps to Aitken and Burns once he became Scotland boss, also capping Davie Provan – who had been bought from Kilmarnock – Charlie Nicholas, Paul McStay, Frank McGarvey - rescued from the Liverpool reserves, Mo Johnston – brought home from Watford and Murdo MacLeod, snapped up from Dumbarton.

The youth policy was still delivering between 1978 an 1986, however. Danny Crainie, Peter Grant, Brian McClair, George McCluskey, Mark Reid and Alan Sneddon all won Under-21 honours. Then, in 1986, Graeme Souness arrived at Ibrox and Scottish football changed for ever. Suddenly, it became that much harder for Celtic's kids to break-through.

In the 30-years since Souness swept into Ibrox, 39 Celtic players have been capped by Scotland: +Brian McClair, Derek Whyte, +Andy Walker, Peter Grant, John Collins*, +Mike Galloway, Tommy Boyd*, +Gordon Marshall, +Tosh McKinlay, +Jackie McNamara, Simon Donnelly, Craig Burley*, Darren Jackson*, Paul Lambert*, Brian O'Neil, Mark Burchill, +Jonathan Gould, Craig Beattie, Scott Brown*, Gary Caldwell*, Kris Commons*, Stephen Crainey, +Rab Douglas, James Forrest, Craig Gordon*, Leigh Griffiths*, Paul Hartley*, John Kennedy, Stephen McManus, Gary Mackay-Stephen*, Shaun Maloney, David Marshall, Kenny Miller*, Charlie Mulgrew, Stephen Pearson*, Barry Robson*, Joe Smith, +Mark Wilson and Kieran Tierney.

The nine players identified by the + sign arrived as experienced players, the 15 identified by the * symbol arrived already capped by Scotland – leaving just 15 to have come through the ranks at the club.

Paul Caddis - Under-21 caps with Celtic, but had to move away to win a full cap

A further 27 Celtic youngsters have been capped at Scotland Under-21 level since 1986 – Paul Caddis, Joe Chalmers, Ryan Conroy, Barry Elliot, Steven Findlay, Marc Fraser, Stevie Fulton, Stuart Gray, John Herron, G Irvine, Stuart Kerr, Paul Lawson, Scott Cuthbert, Simon Lynch, John-Paul McBride, Dylan McGeough, Michael McGlinchey, Callum McGregor, Brian McLaughlin, Mark McNally, Marc Miller, Rocco Quinn, Barry Smith, Liam Toshney, Ross Wallace and Anthony Watt.

Of these, Caddis, Wallace and Watt have all gone on to win full Scotland caps after leaving the club, while McGlinchey has been capped by New Zealand. The sad fact is, of the 27, four never made a first team appearance for the club, only 8 made double-figure number of appearances while only Mark McNally played a century of first team games for Celtic.

Memorably, the 11 Lisbon Lions were all born within a 35-mile radius of Celtic Park. Received wisdom has it, as the song says: "these days are past".

The Lisbon Lions - naming them individually is unnecessary

 Of course, these days, the Champions League is slewed in favour of the supposed, big-money, huge TV audience leagues, making it far harder for the likes of Celtic to win that same trophy as Billy McNeill so-proudly held aloft in Lisbon.

But, I am sure, many members of the Celtic Family, the supposed Greatest Fans In The World, would far-rather see young, home-grown Celtic players pulling on the Hoops, than badge-kissing mercenaries, who are only at the club in the hope of impressing some English or continental club enough, during European campaigns, to win a big-money move away to a more-glamourous football league.

Ronnie Deila has been recruited to manage Celtic within a structure laid down by the board. The structure is working at least as far as the basic plan demands – Celtic are winning the Scottish League title. This is the basic demand made of the manager: "Win the league, get us into Europe".

Deila is not required to win every game 3-0, he is not being asked to meet a pre-determined standard of entertainment, all he has to do is win the league and keep Celtic in Europe. Peter Lawwell is not going to come up to Deila, as Celtic celebrate a Treble or League and Cup Double and say, Michael Caine-like: "You were only supposed to win the League". Sure, if a Double of the much-rarer Treble comes along, Celtic will take it, but, winning the SPFL title is the bottom line, and Deila is on his way to doing that.

As a football romantic, I would rather see Celtic, or indeed any other Scottish side, winning the domestic league with an all-Scottish squad, but, that is not what is asked of them. The competition rules simply demand, one club wins it, by hook or crook.

Scotland is a conservative country (small c). This is particularly true in football, where "Ayebeenism" is rampant. We do not like change in our game. I honestly doubt if sacking Ronnie Dieila will make that much of a difference to Celtic, or to Scottish football, and, for that reason, I am not so sure he will be dispensed with at the end of the season.

After all, there is no guarantee that whichever of the ever-lengthening list of potential successors gets the job, he will do any better. And, in any case, right now – there is no managerial vacancy at Celtic Park.

However, any sports story which can be linked to Celtic or Rangers, or the Rangers Tribute Act, apparently still sells papers or generates website traffic in Scotland, and that is what our MSM is after.

True Blue Murdo - The Tories Wind-Up Merchant

True Blue - Murdo Fraser

ON REFLECTION, the above is not perhaps the best picture of Murdo Fraser, the leading Scottish Tory, there is a hint of craziness in his eyes, but hey, the guy is a Tory.

 

The bold Murdo at least shone a wee bit of levity on the aftermath of yesterday's second Scottish Cup semi-final, with a tweet about "The Queen's 11 winning". Just the right touch of silliness there to get reasonable people smiling and to wind-up the Celtic Family and the Unco Guid at the same time.

 

Even before Murdo was born in 1965, the old "Orange" Scottish Unionist Party had sold its soul and been totally submerged into the Scottish Conservative and Unionist Party, but, as he has shown before, Murdo continues to evoke the old "We Are The People" stance of the SUP.

 

When you reflect on the current state of Scottish fitba, you have to laugh; Murdo provided one. Let's not forget, the weekend's results mean - the 13th-ranked team in Scotland will now meet the 15th-ranked in the Scottish Cup Final. Ignore the fact the match is Rangers v Hibs, its English equivalent would be Bournemouth v Swansea, or, if you like - Jo-Wilfried Songa of France facing Spain's Feliciano Lopez rather than Djokovic v Federer in last year's Wimbledon Men's Singles Final.

 

That 13 should be playing 15 is hardly a ringing endorsement on the quality of the SPFL Premiership. Scottish football is in a mess, we have to face it. Neither semi-final was a classic, I am not holding out much hope for the final, except, I have a nagging suspicion that Hibs might win.

 

Football history is riddled with occasions where one semi-final was seen as: "the real final", that was surely the case at the weekend - when the clash of the Bigot Brothers totally over-shadowed the first semi-final. Well, all too often, when you have a "final before the final", the team that wins that one goes on to lose the real final.

 

 

 

 

 The 1938 East Fife Scottish Cup-winning team

i lifted my glass to my old friend Donald on Saturday night. One of Scotland's leading journalists, Donald is also one of the dwindling band of East Fife fanatics and he was delighted at his team winning the SPFL Division Two title to lift themselves out of th bottom tier.

Now, as a result of the weekend's Scottish Cup semi-finals, the Fifers' Unique Selling Point will vanish. After the final, on 21 May, the Boys from Bayview will no longer be: "The only Second Division club to have won the Scottish Cup", courtesy of their 1938 win over Kilmarnock.

IF YOU like your Scottish football red in tooth and claw, there is only one place to be this Saturday, and that is Newlandsfield Park, home of Pollok Juniors.

 

Newandsfield - the place to be on Saturday

Pollok take-on Hurlford United in the second leg of their Scottish Junior Cup semi-final, with the tie balanced at 0-0 after last Saturday's first leg, at Blair Park, Hurlford.

It is all to play for, the winners going on to face Beith in the final. This one will sizzle, and probably catch fire.

OUR village cafe has a new offering on the menu this morning: "The Ronnie Deila" - that's a slice of toast, covered in bitter orange marmalade.

 

It's Only A Gemme O Fitba - Or Is It?

ONE of the traditions of post-season Scottish rugby tours is that, on the appointed weekend of their toon's Common Riding those Borders players who are on the tour, be they in Australia, Canada, Argentine, New Zealand or South Africa, wherever, send home a telegram to the organisers, with just four words on it: "Safe Oot - Safe Hame".

Hawick Common Riding - Safe Oot - Safe Hame

What has this to do with football? Well, today of all days, we should surely hope all those making their way to Hampden for another traditional Scottish festival of community and togetherness are indeed; Safe Oot - Safe Hame.

The keyboard warriors from The Greatest Fans In The World have been telling us, since 2012: "The Old Firm is no more - Rangers died". Few now believe them,TGFITW will pack one end of the National Stadium, the fans of The Rangers Tribute Ace will pack the other. The tribal songs of hatred, support and passion will be belted out. If the Old Firm (1888 - 2012) died, it is holding one Hell of a wake this afternoon.

If "Rangers" did indeed die in 2012 and Celtic's opponents this afternoon is a whole new club, then that new club has amazingly quickly got under the skin of TGFITW. If it's a new club, that has never met Celtic in a league match, and which lost the only previous cup meeting between them, then such is the lack of confidence and belief among TGFITW, they are getting awfully aerated about what should be just another game.

Celtic will, rightly, start as favourites; they should win, but, will they? This after all is fitba. Let's hope, tomorrow, we are talking about the football, and not the shite which surrounded and, we must conclude still surrounds, an Old Firm match.

The Coffin Dodgers Lunch Club to which I belong was holding its monthly get together yesterday, thus, the closest I got to the Hibernian v Dundee United semi-final was listening to Sportsound on the car radio.

By all accounts, I didn't miss much - "A draw nae fitba" was one description. At least, the lieges got a penalty shoot-out to become excited over, and a new Hibs Hero, stand-in goalkeeper Conrad Logan, emerged.

The Irishman is, indeed a big man. Pictures make him look a tad "chunky", but, those branding him as "fat" perhaps should remember, one of the greatest of the many Scotland goalkeepers to have back-stopped Easter Road teams since the end of World War II, Tommy Younger, was the same height and weight as Logan. I do not recall anyone labeling Younger as "fat".

 

Tommy Younger saves for Scotland v West Germany in 1957

 

Younger, when he was dropped in favour of Bill Brown during the 1958 World Cup Finals in Sweden, was Scotland's most-capped goalkeeper. He was, at that time, a Liverpool player. One of his successors as a Liverpool and Scotland 'keeper was Tommy Lawrence: "The Flying Pig".

 

Tommy Lawrence in action for Liverpool

 

Lawrence, who hailed from Dailly in South Ayrshire, was another big keeper, while, across Liverpool's Stanley Park, the Evertonians still consider Welshman Neville Southall to have been their club's greatest 'keeper.

 

Neville Southall

It would take greater "Photoshopping" skills than I possess, to turn Neville into a stick insect - but, his prowess as a shot-stopper, also those of Messrs Younger and Lawrence, cannot be denied.

 

Conrad Logan (25) celebrates yesterday

 

Logan might not have the pedigree of those named above, but, his success yesterday demonstrates, you should never discount a 'keeper just because he is a big lad - and that's without mentioning the legendary Billy "Fatty" Foulkes, pictured below.

 

 Billy Foulkes

THOSE of us who confess to life-long addiction to following Kilmarnock have had little to cheer this season. The next few weeks will be difficult enough, as we endeavour to avoid the end-of-season promotion-relegation play-off and extend our stay in the top flight.

 

So what we don't need is the side-show of a legal battle over Rugby Park's USP, or Unique Selling Point - the Killie Pie.

 

I consider myself the world's greatest expert on this Ayrshire delicacy, and my honest opinion is - Browning's, who bake them, are at it in a big way.

 

You see, what is little known outwith Kilmarnock is, the delicacy might better be described as; "A Galston Pie", since it was developed in that Irvine Valley town by butcher, the late Billy Wales.

 

Billy, who died last year, came up with the recipe, baked them originally then when the legend took off, got Browning's involved to meet the higher demand.

 

Billy was a Killie fan. For my view, knowing Billy, Browning's have no right to the name "Killie Pie". They should back off, before m'learned friends get properly involved.

 

For my money, those Killie Pies produced by Billy Wales, were superior to the still tasty examples which Browning's now produce. Can I also say, the smaller-size Killie Pies, which we get served-up in the Rugby Park Media Suite, are better than the normal-sized pies the punters eat.

 

Browning's ought to grin and bear it, and pay the royalty on each pie sold which Killie are demanding. On this occasion, and just this once - I am on the same side as Michael Johnston. It is a Killie Pie, because it was developed for Kilmarnock FC, not because it is baked in the town.

 

 

 

Well Said Craig Burley

CRAIG Burley - Ah kent his faither, Ah played in the same schuil team as him. Hell, Ah ken him, and his Uncle Geordie. Craig, according to his old school PE teacher, Bill Baillie: "Had star quality, even as a 12-year-old". He was always going to make it in football.

But, while admiring his merits as a player, I must admit, I never saw Craig, or his good buddy Billy Dodds ever making it as media pundits, so, kudos to both. Craig has travelled a long way from what we locals dub: "The People's Socialist Republic of Craigens" to his current gig in the good ole U S of A. He's not the first from these airts to Go West, he will not be the last, and I am happy for him, the boy has done well.

So, I was pleased to see him, today, telling it like it as regards Sunday's "Old Firm" semi-final at Hampden. As Craig said, with the honesty which has been his watch-word since he first dipped his toes in the shark and piranah-infested media pool: "This will be shite".

Of course, it is likely to be shite; two poor teams, from a poor league, playing on a poor pitch. But, it might well be exciting, and, in any case, so long as their side wins, The Greatest Fans In The World and Ra Peepul will not be demanding their money back, because they were not entertained.

Sure, some of the purists among TGFITW will perhaps have a moan if they don't get at least one stunning goal to celebrate, as for RP, as long as the Rangers Tribute Act wins, even if through the time-honoured means of a dodgy penalty - they will unleash their battle hymns at volume 11.

Craig Burley

Craig Burley's take on things got me thinking. We  live here on this wee rocky upper 40% or so of a wee island off the coast of mainland Europe, where we are brought-up to believe we are: "The Master Race in football" (Alex Ferguson); "The Greatest Wee Nation God Ever Put Breath Intae" (various Scots); "The Best Small Nation On Earth" (Jack McConnell).

We reflect with pride on the many achievements and inventions which have been credited to Scots down through the years. We laud Robert Burns, Billy Connelly, Andrew Carnegie and Adam Smith, to name but a few Scottish icons. We take pride in the part Scots played in the formation and management of the great British Empire, and of how the sons and daughters of Scots, many driven from their homeland by the Highland Clearances and the perditions of  the uneven rewards of the Industrial Revolution.

We point to "Clyde-built" as the epitome of shipbuilding greatness, we speak with pride of how Scottish-built railway engines worked across the world - then we stay at home and allow ourselves to be Cinderella to our Ugly Sister - England.

There is a huge world out there, and, just occasionally, it takes an intervention from a Scot who has gone out into that bigger world and prospered, such as Craig Burley, to remind us, what a wee, backward, insular nation we can be.

I cannot think of a single tactical innovation produced by Scottish football, since Queen's Park invented the passing game back in the 1860s. The likes of Bill Struth (the pivot centre-half), Jock Stein (Total Football) and Andy Roxburgh (Pressing) have adapted and polished devices throught up by others. The "Dalgleish Turn", for instance, is I think a subtler, more-efficient move than the "Cruyff Turn" from which Kenny adapted it - but, real football innovation,don't look here.

Mind you, if some Scottish coach was to come up with something entirely new and ground-breaking, he would instantly be assailed with cries of: "Naw son, ye canna dae that, it's aye been done this wey".

 

And, in damning "The Greatest Club Match In The World" with faint, indeed no praise, Craig Burley is simply following a long line of Scottish football media men: Hugh McIllvaney, Patrick Barclay, Sam Leitch etc, who went out into the wide world and realised, the auld certainties they had learned at their Grannie's knee, didn't wash in the bigger wider world.

By the way, can anyone tell me which sides are playing in the other semi-final? I assume there is another game, Dundee United v Hibs, I think. It's just, I haven't seen too-much written about it, or heard or seen a lot about in in the broadcast media.

WELL done Atletico Madrid, in knocking-out Barcelona to reach the last four of the Champions League. I think it is fair to say, Atletico and Manchester City are the two "shock" sides in the last four, and I await tomorrow's draw with interest.

I must admit, I fancied PSG to beat the "Noisy Neighbours", so, fair play to City for seeing them off. They really are putting pressure on United, who eased their troubles slightly by beating West Ham on Wednesday night to reach the FA Cup semi-finals.

Present Manchester City boss Manuel Pellegrini, left, and his replacement from next season, Pep Guardiola, above.

Should City go all the way in Europe, what a leaving present from manager Manuel Pellegrini, dumped in favour of Pep Guardiola. Anyone for a City v Bayern final? 

THIS being a European Week and with the Bigot Brothers' Sunday meeting getting the big build-up, Tuesday night's SPFL Championship encounter, which finished in a 2-2 draw, between Falkirk and Hibs rather passed without comment.

Yet again, Hibs blew a big game, and, after their comeback from two goals down to snatch a draw, you have to make Falkirk the favourites to finish second in the Championship, and thus have the easier path through the play-offs.

Since I fear Kilmarnock might be the Premiership team drawn into this end-of-season survival battle, I think I will become a temporary Falkirk fan. I fancy our chances more against the Bairns than I do against the HIbbees.

Old Firm - Dead Or Alive? It's Still The Only Show In Town For The Scottish Media

SINCE yesterday was Monday, it was Kenny Dalglish and Graeme Souness. Who will it be today?

Ally McCoist has re-surfaced, now the RTA have won the Championship, so he must be due a gig, perhaps alongside Neil Lennon. Stuart McCall hasn't had his face in the papers for a day or two, and Murdo MacLeod has been a bit quiet of late.

Better get a couple of the foreign mercenaries in to tell us this is the Greatest Club Game in the Whole Wide World. Yes folks, in spite of various sects of the Celtic Family insisting: "They're a new club - Rangers died in 2012", the Scottish media has gone into full Old Firm mode this week.

And there was me thinking, each cup competition had TWO semi-finals. Maybe I was wrong.

THE Hampden pitch is being torn-up and re-laid, again, ready for the weekend games. A dodgy, potentially-dangerous and short-sighted move, if you ask me. I stand by what I posted recently - the quick answer to the problem is to get Queen's Park to play their home games on Lesser Hampden - that will do as much as any radical surgery to sort-out the international pitch.

I see, with familiar sleight-of-hand the "blazers" on the sixth floor have found a potential scape-goat. It seems it was all the fault of referee George Salmond, who allowed a Queen's Park v Berwick Rangers game to go ahead on Boxing Day. That's what did for the pitch.

 Referee George Salmond - blamed for pitch fiasco

Alex Salmond - who usually gets the blame when things go wrong in Scotland

Severe restraint by the High Heid Yins there, blaming George Salmond - maybe they hadn't the cojones to blame Alex Salmond, or the SNP. After all, if you're following the 2016 Holyrood election campaign, you must know by now, everything that has gone wrong in Scotland, ever, is the fault of the SNP.

The thing which strikes me as funny is, George Salmond, as a former Scotland cricket captain probably has a better knowledge of reading the state of pitches than most - after all, it was one of the skills he had to have in his cricketing career.



I HAVE this mate, Jock, who, if he could have avoided fast women and slow horses, would by now be awaiting his name coming up in the Panama Papers scandal. Instead, Jock has made greater contribution than most to the Retired Bookmakers Benevolent Society. He, for instance, every year got a Thank You Christmas card from the late Freddie Williams.

Any way, back in 1988, Jock was actually ahead of the game one week and, on leaving work on Friday, he popped into the local branch of William Hill's, to collect the £250 in winnings he had lying. On his way to the pay-out window however, he noticed the odds Hill's were offering on the England v Republic of Ireland match, which was going to be played in the European Championships the next day.

There is no way the Republic can win, was Jock's reasoning, so, he put the whole £250 on England - and that is why, next afternoon, when everyone in the local Orange Club was going ape-shit to celebrate wee Ray Houghton's winning goal - Jock was the man sitting with his head in his hands, crying.

Ray Houghton - moved Jock to tears

Ray Houghton is still a couple of bad words to Jock. Which is why, Alex Ferguson showed real class, in congratulating Danny Willets on winning the Masters on Sunday - considering Fergie had lost £8000, which he had on Jordan Spieth to win. 



I NOTE from the English papers this morning, redundancies are about to be announced at Aston Villa, who are apparently doomed to be relegated from the English Premiership this season.

As ever, the axe will fall on the "little people", the back-room staff, many of whom are Villa through and through. The under-performing players who are cast adrift will, by and large, get a chance to under-perform elsewhere - a fate which has already befallen some of the under-performing managers, such as Paul Lambert.

Jasper Carrot - will get comedy mileage out of Villa's relegation

True Villa men such as Brian Little will try to pick up the pieces in the Championship - while Birmingham City fan Jasper Carrot will and West Brom fanatic Frank Skinner will be able to trot out that old chestnut: "Football in Birmingham, you never know, it might catch-on".

But, such is the unreal world of the Premiership. Mind you, if Villa can function in the Championship minus the 50 personnel we hear might lose their jobs - does it not hold good, they are probably over-staffed in the Premiership? Further proof, should it be needed, of how English football at the top end has totally lost the plot.



TONIGHT is a Champions League Night, with Manchester City v PSG the stand-out fixture. Don't know about you, but, with  Vincent Kompany out of the City team, I reckon big Zlatan Ibrahimovic just might again work his magic for PSG.