RALPH Topping - who him? - emerged from Hampden yesterday and, if not quite waving a piece of paper in the air, promised peace in our time. It seems the 12 SPL clubs had reached agreement on a way forward for Scottish football.
Aye Right.
For all the talk of a single governing body, inter-division play-offs and so on, the truth remains, most of the football will still be shite, we will still have too-many clubs and, once (if ever! given the degree of in-fighting going on there, not to mention one or two still untamed gorillas in the Blue room) peace breaks out, self-interest is back in and Old Firm hegemony is restored at the top of our game, the same two teams as always will still run things and we will be no better off.
However, the image of peace in our time, plus the date, got me thinking about another Conservative leader waving a piece of paper about and shouting: "Peace in our time" - Neville Chamberlain, on his return from Munich in 1938, 75-years ago, after meeting a testicularly-challenged Austrian-born house-painter named Adolf Hitler.
What's this got to do with fitba? you ask.
Well, there has always been a particularly robust football relationship between Scotland and Austria. The two countries have much in common, both relatively small and living cheek-by-jowl with football elephants, us with those lovely white-shirted Saxon chaps, them with an equally lovely and oft-unloved white-shirted bunch - the Germans. Just for extra spice, by the way, the Austrians also have a fairly robust relationship with the Hungarians.
Like us, the Austrians used to have a feared reputation across Europe for playing above their station and for a period in the 1930s their Wunderteam was the best team in the world - but, like the Hungarians, they never conclusively proved this by beating the rest at the World Cup, although they did hammer a below-strength Scotland team 5-0 in 1931.
Another link between the two countries is the influence of master coach Jimmy Hogan, the Lancastrian, scandalously under-appreciated in the UK who did, during a short spell at Celtic in the 1950s seriously-influence tghe thinking of a certain Jock Stein.
After that 1931 Vienna hammering, the Austrians and the Scots literally fought-out a series of tousy games over the next few years. Torry Gillick was sent-off, but refused to leave the field in the 1937 Vienna kicking match; Willie Woodburn laid-out an Austrian at Hampden in 1950 as the Austrians became the first continental side to win in the British Isles; in the return bout in Vienna in May 1951, Billy Steel got sent off as Scotland lost 4-0.
Tommy Docherty will still tell you the Scots were, with the help of some laissez faire refereeing and a one-eyed Swiss linesman, kicked off the park in the 1954 World Cup clash, won 1-0 by the Austrians, then, a year later, in Vienna, it really kicked-off.
Gordon Smith, standing-in as Scotland captain for the injured George Young, gave his best display in a Scotland shirt, ripping the Austrian left flank to bits. So, they decided to kick him off the park to the extent that "the Gay Gordon" punched Rockl, the Austrian left-half. The Austrian was ordered-off, some of the crowd invaded the park to get at Smith and Lawrie Reilly, going to his Famous Five colleague's assistance, laid-out one of the invaders.
Docherty then laid-out Erich Probst the Austrian inside left and a couple of platoons of the 51st Highland Division, who were stationed in Vienna in those post-WWII years formed a protective cordon around the Scots as they left the field 4-1 winners.
Things were "tasty" when the Austrians came to Glasgow in 1956, but there were no serious casualties and, just when everyone thought peace had finally broken-out and the admittedly very good Ocwirk-Hannappi inspired Austrian team of the 1950s - they finished third in the 1954 World Cup - Austria returned to Glasgow, 50-years ago today, on 8 May, 1963.
They found waiting for them a Scotland team with a guid conceit o' themselves. They had surged unbeaten through the 1962-63 Home Internationals, beating England 2-0 at Wembley in a match in which they had played 85 of the 90 minutes with ten men after skipper Eric Caldow broke his leg.
Jim Baxter and Denis Law were absolutely "World Class" and would prove this by being picked for the FIFA XI which played England in the FA Centenary Match at Wembley later that year. Right back Alex Hamilton from Dundee, Dave Mackay, Willie Henderson and Davie Wilson were only slightly behind that ranking; indeed, if Mackay wasn't officially "World Class" then the guys picking that level of player knew nothing.
Another outstanding Scot, John White of Tottenham was injured, so into the side in his place, for his first cap, came Davie Gibson, the midfield brains behind the great "Ice Kings" Leicester City team which had faltered in the home straight in chasing a rare league and cup double in England.
There were two more newcomers to the Scotland team; left-back Davie Holt of Hearts, replacing Caldow, was an Olympian, he had played for Great Britain in the 1960 Rome Olympics, while centre forward Jimmy Millar had been scoring goals for fun as one half of the deadly Rangers' Brand and Millar strike force. The other two players weren't bad either, Bill Brown was in goal on his way to setting a Scottish goalkeeper's appearance record of 28 caps, which stood until Alan Rough overtook him while Ian Ure had won his selection battle with Billy McNeill to get the number five jersey in a team which read: Brown (Tottenham Hotspur), Hamilton (Dundee) and Holt (Heart of Midlothian), Mackay (Tottenham Hotspur), Ure (Dundee) and Baxter (Rangers), Henderson (Rangers), Gibson (Leicester City), Millar (Rangers), Law (Manchester United) and Wilson (Rangers).
They ripped into the Austrians from the start. Davie Wilson struck twice in the opening 26 minutes and, with the 95,000 Hampden crowd loving it, the Austrians lost it.
Horst Nemec their centre forward was sent off for spitting in referee Jim Finney's face and had to be virtually hauled off the park by the Glesca polis.
Law made it 3-0 after 33 minutes and the Austrians decided, if they were going to be beaten, they would take at least one body home with them. Sadly for them, the men they mostly decided to kick were Mackay and Law!! The mayhem continued into the second half until Law made it 4-0 after 71 minutes.
A minute later Anton Linhart pulled a goal back, but, far from pacifying the visitors, this only served to wind them up even more. Erich Hof should have gone for an assault on wee Willie Henderson, which belied his status as "The Professor of Football", then Linhart had a kick at Denis Law, who simply did what Law did in such circumstances - he kicked the Austrian back, harder.
That was the final straw for Mr Finney, the genial referee from Hereford - he walked off the park, waving his arms to indicate the match was over after 79 minutes.
Enter the polis to separate the players, who were exchanging blows rather than shirts. The Scots and the Austrians didn't meet again on the park until they were drawn together in the 1970 World Cup qualifying groups, but apart from the obligatory yellow card for John Greig, this one passed off peacefully.
It seemed, like Muhammad Ali and Joe Frasier, the combatants had mellowed and learned to, if not love each other, get along together - then Celtic were paired with Rapid Vienna.....
Scotland v Austria - a rammy waiting to happen; and it did, 50-years ago today.
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