Socrates MacSporran

Socrates MacSporran
No I am not Chick Young, but I can remember when Scottish football was good

Wednesday 31 August 2022

Who'd Be A Scottish Club Manager? Too-Many Deluded Fools, Unfortunately

IN THE wake of Jack Ross's sacking as Dundee United manager – after a mere seven weeks in-charge, and hard on the heels of a 0-9 home rubbing at the hands of Celtic, I turn again to the wise words of Alistair MacLeod.

I learned much listening to Ally hold court in that tiny office under the Somerset Park stairs. His post-game meetings with the press were often hilarious, sometimes lengthy, but never boring. I recall one night, after an ugly Ayr United win which had brought all the scorn arch-critic Enclosure George Reid could vent at Ally, from his perch behind the home dug-out.

Does George's constant criticism bother you,” one of our number asked. “Not really,” said Ally. “It comes with the territory, and, so long as George and his ilk are having a go at me, my job is safe. The time to worry is when they start having a go at the Chairman and the Directors – that's when, to protect themselves, they sack the manager.”

Now, I am unaware how much abuse Dundee United owner Mark Ogren has been getting from the unhappy Arabs fans, but, in the wake of a seven-goal thumping in Europe and this nine-goal bashing from Celtic, I suppose some unhappiness has been evident to the American owner. However, since the unfortunate Ross is his fifth Manager in as many years as Owner, I fear Mr Ogren is a man of little patience and an itchy-trigger sacking figure.

With his record, I will be amazed if he finds someone soon prepared to take the Tannadice job, or, an adequate manager who will be given enough time to turn things around. Perhaps some venerable Tannadice supporter should take the owner aside and explain to him, the club's greatest personality – the late Jim McLean, on taking over from Jerry Kerr, the man who made United relevant in Tayside football, still took eight years to win his first trophy.

The same supporter should also remind the Owner, United haven't won one of the three meaningful domestic honours since 2012, but, given the supposed “Big Team in Dundee” - sitting 200 yards up the road, have won nothing of note since 1974, and are one division down from them, United are still Cocks of the Walk on Tayside.

The current distressed state of the game in the City of Discovery reminds me of a joke I first heard from the late comedian Bobby Knutt, at Batley Variety Club, in the mid-1970s.

What do I think of football in Sheffield,” wee Bobby mused. “I don't know, it might catch on.” Knutty was a life-long “Blade”, a supporter of Sheffield United, so he was speaking from the heart.

I should maybe note in the passing – Sheffield United have won nothing of note since The FA Cup in 1925, while rivals Sheffield Wednesday have won nothing since The League Cup in 1991, so Dundee isn't the only major British city living with years of football under-achievement.

I do feel for the sacked Ross. In just eight years he has gone from being the “hottest” young manager in the game to being twice sacked by under-achieving Scottish provincial clubs, both incidently owned by Americans. Might this be a factor? Both United's Ogren and Hibs' Ron Gordon are new to Scottish football and perhaps could do with a crash course in the history of our game. Instant success does not happen up here.

Mind you, I have long maintained, The Bigot Brothers will continue to ride roughshod over the rest of Scottish football until there is a proper CBA – a Collective Bargaining Agreement in-place, to level the financial playing field. I would also suggest mergers to form single clubs in Dundee and Edinburgh would also help level-up the spread of the honours. However, I don't see that happening any time soon – if ever.




THE LEAGUE CUP is the embarrassing uncle of Scottish football. This young upstart – a mere 75 years old, against the League's 131 years and the Scottish Cup's 149 years, has struggled to maintain relevance – they don't even give you a European place for winning it.

Certainly, as with the two older trophies, the magnificent League Cup is more-often to be found in one or other of two Glasgow trophy rooms, but, it has thrown-up its share of shocks, never more-so than in season 1971-72. when Partick Thistle surprised even themselves by beating Celtic.

It used to be the harbinger of the new season, with big crowds turning-up on opening day to get their first fix of fitba for the new season. These days, however, the league cup almost coughs and apologises for sidling into play to remind us, summer will soon be over. Indeed, these days those clubs who have qualified for Europe are excused participation into the second round.

This week is the week when the big boys, all bar Heart and the Bigot Brothers already out of Europe for another year, come into the competition. I have said this before and I will doubtless say it again – if the League Cup is going to be treated as a diversion from the league, then, at least make it meaningful.

Why don't the powers-that-be, at the very-least, invoke the “eight diddies rule” so that each team has to have than many Scotsmen on the park at all times during the games. That way we would be showcasing native talent and giving young Scottish players a chance to show what they could do.

It just might make it a less-predictable, more-even competition.




FINALLY – Yesterday I read on the online Scottish Rugby website The Offside Line, about the regime new Glasgow Warriors' Head Coach Franco Smith has instituted at Scotstoun.

The new South African Honcho has what he calls: “The Cheese Puff Squad,” players who are returning from injury or are felt to need to shed some weight, in the gym at 7am and on the exercise bike. Apparently this timing speeds up the body's metabolism. He also had other squad members out on the pitch, working on set match-play situations.

Just a thought, I wonder if even GvB and Ange the Aussie could get that level of commitment out of their guys at Milngavie or Lennoxtown. I suspect the wee lambs would be screaming at the inconvenience.











 

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